Public or Private?

Its easy to gain fifty pounds but not so easy to lose it.  I've been steadily gaining weight since January 2007 which is when I suffered a head injury and had to severely curtail my workouts as a result.  Since that time I've gained, you guessed it, fifty pounds.

I've occasionally lost a few pounds here and there but those few pounds always come back with a few of their friends.  Its discouraging to say the least.

What you may not know is that from 2005 to 2006 I was training with a personal trainer and preparing for a figure competition.  The results of following his meal plan and workout program were phenomenal. Unfortunately, the cost and time available to me became an issue after I unexpectedly became a Mom for the third time.  Because the results were so phenomenal and I was in such good shape, its especially hard for me to deal with this fifty pounds of fat hanging out around my waistline.

Extra weight makes me feel unsexy and unattractive, not to mention that my clothes don't fit anymore, which only adds to the feelings of unattractiveness. 

Its extremely frustrating to try every method of losing weight and see no results and I know there are many of you who know this feeling all too well.  But it was never gonna happen to me, I was always going to be thin and fit.

In just the past four weeks I've added another 3 pounds to my body, and that's using walking, weights, and food diaries as weight loss aids.  And, no, I haven't gained 3 pounds of muscle and lost inches.  I use a scale that measure body fat percentage and a measuring tape for my waistline.  The percentage of bodyfat has increased slightly as has my waistline.  Things are not moving along in the right direction at all.

I've used putting pictures of my "fit" self on the fridge to stop me from eating; I've used motivational quotes; I've walked 3 miles a day for the past 4 weeks (minus work days).  The weight won't budge.

A suggestion that I have not yet tried is publicizing my weight loss goal.  Apparently if you tell your friends and family, etc. that you are attempting to lose weight, the results are better because then you are held accountable to them.  I've talked to my very closest friends about losing weight but it doesn't take long until we find ourselves at Dairy Queen, Tim Horton's, or McDonalds, having a "treat" to soothe our nerves from a tumultuous day. I've been on an emotional roller coaster the past few weeks/months with relationships, moving, work, family members, and so on.  There is nothing like a DQ Blizzard to make you forget all about a failed relationship, or a Iced Coffee from Tim's to get you psyched up to go to work, also known as emotional eating. 

What I'd like to do is publicize my attempts at weight loss through my blog.  Doing so would hold me accountable to more than just a few close friends.  It would also open a dialogue regarding weight gain, obesity and health issues.

I'd love to share this journey with you.  Any suggestions?  Hints?  Anyone want to join Kev and I on our morning walks?